Yesterday, I was playing tennis with a friend and won 16:13. He plays approximately at my level, usually slightly higher as I lost most games against him last year.
I realized a few things that gave me an edge this time.
Whenever I’m focused on winning so much that I cling onto it, I am afraid to loose. Meaning, I am uncertain I can win, even though I hope to. It’s a neutral state which does no good for me.
When I focus that much on winning, I get nervous and my mind is crowded with thoughts.
It doesn’t matter if it’s winning the next point or the game, it creates fear and uncertainty because winning is not an absolute.
When I focus on playing the best I can play, with great technique and full body movement, my mind is clear. When I focus on enjoying the game and focus on growing and learning, my mind is clear.
When I’m grateful for being outside playing tennis with a good friend, my mind is clear.
And when my mind is clear, my game is top and I win.
So in tennis, winning criteria is clear mind. And I get to a clear mind by focusing on playing the best I can, enjoy the game and be in a state of learning and growing.
The loosing criteria is focusing on winning in a way that tells me I haven’t won yet and that I may as well loose.
Playing Tennis vs. Playing Business
How does that translate into business? Can it be applied in the same way?
When I browse LinkedIn to connect with potential clients and partners, and I focus on setting up the perfect follow up system, move them into categories in my CRM to never forget a follow up and then think carefully what to write in each message, the results are usually average.
Meaning low response rates, conversations that lead to nowhere and clients I don’t fully enjoy working with.
When I browse LinkedIn and focus on connecting with the people who give me a sense of wonder and curiosity and whom I could possible learn from, things flow with ease.
I connect with people who introduce me to my best clients, partners and who become lifelong ambassadors.
The same goes for goal setting.
When I focus on setting goals that just focus on profit, I tend to loose and lack motivation to pursue them with full energy.
When I set goals that give me a sense of wonder, curiosity and make me grow and learn a lot, I’m unstoppable and invincible.
What are your winning and loosing criteria in business or any other area of life?
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