You know you need to keep in touch with the people in your network. This is nothing new.
However, sometimes, we feel like sending another article feels like too systematized in a keep in touch strategy that should be based on being human.
I have a great solution for you in this article.
“We Don’t Need More Stuff, We Need More Humanity”
I wrote down this quote from Seth Godin’s The Icarus Deception as one of my favorite ones. It simply reflects 100% what I believe in.
Recently, a women who is building her coaching business asked me “Do you think we need more life coaches in Switzerland?”.
Direct as I am, I told her “The world does not need any more coaches, consultants or project managers. What the world needs is unique, self-expressed and bold human beings who strive to build a legacy.”
We don’t need more stuff or coaches or consultants or average products. What we need is more humanity.
Sharing Your Compassion to Bring Back Humanity
I regularly ask myself – like many of us I guess – why I am here.
I know why I do what I do is because I believe you are meant to do meaningful work you love with people who inspire you and this has never changed. Additionally, I also feel like I’m on a mission to bring back humanity into business.
You can make your keep in touch efforts a lot more human when you share your compassion with people.
We have a huge lack of “thank you” and sincere “congratulations” in today’s business world.
When you share your compassion with people in your network, they feel appreciated. We all love to feel appreciated.
Just remember that people can smell fake intent from far away, even through LinkedIn and email. Your outreach efforts, when sharing your compassion, has to be sincere, otherwise nothing will ever happen as a result.
3 Opportunities to Share Your Compassion
Let me show you three examples of situations where you can share your compassion and how you could go about it.
1. The New Born Baby
Let’s say your new connection just got a new born baby. Because you care about her, you reach out and share your compassion, maybe something like this.
“Hi Elena, I just heard from our mutual friend that you had a baby, congratulations. I remember when my wife and I got our first-born, it’s a wonderful feeling. Let us know if we can help you with anything.
Lots of good health and love for the whole family.”
2. The New Job
Let’s say your connection just got promoted and you want to reach out.
First, do some research on where he works now and what he is doing if you don’t know much. You could say something like
“Hi Carlo, I just noticed that you changed jobs and company. Congratulations to the new challenge. I saw you are now in charge of the business development department at Fast Growing Startup and moved to Zurich. Enjoy the new surrounding.”
When you see somebody changing jobs on LinkedIn, don’t just comment with “congrats” without even knowing what’s going on. A few months ago, I updated my title at jordico on my LinkedIn profile to “Career Revolution Coach” and several people commented “congrats to the new job”.
Seriously? Please do your homework first.
3. The Simple Thank You
Let’s say you just read an article from somebody in your network. Maybe you don’t know that person very well yet but would want to develop a deeper relationship.
A simple thank you can go a long way.
Let’s say the person published an article that is a personal manifesto on how the industry he is in is broken and how he is attempting to fix it. You could say something like
“Hi John, I just read your article about the educational system and I admire your bravery to express yourself in such a big way. Thank you for making the world a better place.”
4. The Simple How Are You
How many times a day do you hear the question “How are you”? I’m guessing many times.
Here, I’m not talking about the “How are you (you can tell me but I don’t really care)”. I’m talking about a sincere question.
I relentlessly cleaned up my network a while ago and now, I exclusively keep in touch with people in my network that I truly care about. Because of that, it’s easy for me to say “How are you” sincerely.
If you are still in the clean up process, work through the Communication Excellence Workbook, it will help you create a filtration system that only let’s energizing & inspiring people into your network.
Here is what I say.
“Hi Marco, I just thought about you when I saw the new born baby of my friend Maureen. How are you and how is the baby?”
“Hi Andrea, I just realized that we did not talk for almost two months. You were giving a workshop two weeks ago, right? How did things go?”
Hi Sandra, I just met Jason and he mentioned that you are moving to Basel. Are all the 700 boxes packed already?”
How to Implement the “Share Your Compassion” Strategy
I was a bit hesitant to call it a strategy at first because it’s not about systematically sharing your compassion. However, if you find the intersection between looking at it like a strategy with lots of humanity and developing a habit of caring, you will be fine.
I will do my best to give you a structured approach to something that is more of an art than a strategy.
1. Have Your Red Velvet Rope in Place
If you have too many people in your network who are less than ideal for you, this approach won’t work well, because you can’t share your compassion sincerely.
So first, create a filtration system that separates ideal from non-ideal people in your network.
This will also help you when expanding your network so you only let people into your network who energize & inspire you.
2. Write Down Whom to Share Your Compassion With
Make a list of 10 people you care about the most and write down for what you could thank or congratulate them.
3. Make the Call or Send the Email
Now it’s time for the toughest part of the process. Without making the call or sending the email, nothing happens.
Pick up the phone, call your friend and share what you want to share.
Write the email and hit “send”.
4. Turn Step 1-3 Into a Habit
To turn this into a habit, you first need to discipline yourself.
Schedule 30-60 minutes per week or 15 minutes per day to think about people you want to share your compassion with and then do it.
This may feel a bit too systematic in the beginning but it’s essential to create the habit of doing it, especially, if you have not done it much or struggle with doing it.
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