Here’s the deal, not knowing what to say when following up with people is not the real problem.

What?!

You’re not having trouble authentically keeping in touch with people because you don’t know what to say, but because you either lack clarity or you want to keep in touch with the wrong people.

I know, it’s tough love but here’s why this is the truth.

You have a million different ways of keeping in touch with people. You can send them an article you just read, a tool you just used, a video you just watched or simply say “Thank you for being you. You’re awesome”.

Now, the challenge is, if you’re not clear on WHY you want to follow up with people, you’re likely not going to do it. Like with everything, if your why is not big enough, the how will never happen. That’s why we procrastinate.

 

Why Them?

So why do you want to keep in touch with people?

Do you want to win them as clients? As partners? Do you want to speak at their events? Win them as a speaker at your events? Host a workshop at their organization? Interview them for your blog?

Or do you tell yourself, “I just want to see how we can be of mutual benefit to each other.”?

That reminds me of an email I once received from a client I worked with. He said “Before I started working with Daniel, I would just reach out and ask people to connect with the nebulous reason that we “may be of benefit to each other”. Working with Daniel, I learned a methodology to appeal to potential contacts at a deep fundamental level.”

If you’re reason why is not clear, you won’t make it past the barrier of actually reaching out to them more than once and we all know that most impactful business relationships are not built on reaching out once.

So ask yourself these questions.

Why do you want to connect with them?

And how do they benefit from that connection?

 

The Right People

The second issue may be that you are not connected to the right people. Just because they are a big shot and could potentially do massive business deals with you is not enough to qualify them as a great connection.

If there is no resonance on a deeper level, forget doing business with them because even if they have massive potential, they will never feel that level of trust and likability to actually do big business with you.

Ask yourself these questions to verify if somebody is an ideal contact or not.

What are the core values that we both share that makes us great collaborators?

What is the vision of a future that we both have in common?

If you can’t give an answer to each of these questions that feel genuine, stop trying to force yourself upon somebody and start connecting with people who actually do share your values and your vision for the future.

Over the past three years, I have cleaned up my CRM system several times because we all fall into the trap of letting the wrong people into our world. And by wrong, I don’t mean bad people. I simply mean people who don’t deeply resonate with you.

Every single time I cleaned up my network, I regained the energy and joy of re-connecting with people and genuinely caring for them.

You can’t genuinely care for people you have nothing in common with when it comes to values and vision. Don’t try to go against your nature and focus on the people who naturally resonate with you.

 

By the way, if you want a more authentic and effective way of connecting with these people, make sure you download the 23 Mental Triggers That Make Busy People Say YES.

 

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